Dr. Charm Quark, PhD
Particle physicist by training, board-room consultant by half-life.
Dr. Charm Quark earned her PhD in Strong-Force Strategy from CERN-adjacent State, where her thesis — On the Quarterly Decay of Mid-Tier Consultancies — was awarded the prestigious J/ψ Prize for Most Confidently Wrong Equation.
Following a brief postdoc as a quark in a Tevatron mesonic state, Dr. Quark transitioned to consulting full-time, citing 'better cafeteria options'. She is one of three known quarks holding both a doctorate and a Series 7 license.
Dr. Quark's published works include The Color Charge of Capital (Wiley, 2024), Synergy and the Strong Force (HBR Press, 2025), and the controversial You Are What You Confine (self-published, 2026, withdrawn after independent peer review).
"Strategy is just particle physics with worse equations and better lunches."
— Dr. Charm Quark, PhD